


the Light Returns

by Jurudo



Category: Tales of Xillia
Genre: 10 years later, M/M, No Beta, characters to be added as I go, spirit ludger
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-18
Updated: 2019-01-29
Packaged: 2019-03-20 15:50:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13720941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jurudo/pseuds/Jurudo
Summary: it has been 10 years since the end of the trail and origin has decided that now is the time to grant Ludger the second chance at life he deserved.





	1. prologue

**Author's Note:**

> I am totally new to this and this thing will be my first fic, I mostly just wanted to help fill the xillia 2 tag and spread some more Jurudo love! Any constructive criticism would be greatly appreciated!

“Those humans have been through a lot haven’t they, Chronos?”

“That was the point of all this was it not?” Chronos stated as he watched as Origin gently placed his hand on the fractured dimension counter.

“In a way yes, however that young man had to shoulder much all on his own and to think it was all for the sake of one little girl.”

“A girl that did not belong in this world, those humans may have one the trial but they once again prove their own selfish desires.”

“Maybe but that’s what makes them so interesting, that man had a home to return to and yet he decided to give it all up, leaving behind only his memory, it’s quite sad.”

“All humans die Origin that one was no different, you should not mourn his death.” Origin released a humourless chuckle , he knew such a conversation with his friend would be pointless but he couldn’t get that young man out of his head. That man had been the first in a very long time to show him the true worth of humans, to show him their desires to protect and fight for their loved ones, it was inspiring. Origin knew that even to a certain degree Chronos felt the same, he would never admit it but it was clear that his friend respected the young man after everything was over.

“Don’t you think he deserves a second chance at life?”

“What are you getting at? Not even you could give back his life with such ease.”

“You’re right, his human life as it once was is gone now but perhaps he could live on as a spirit”

“That is out of the question, those that knew him before are still alive and it would be more of a nuisance than anything else” Chronos firmly rejected the idea, he knew of the love Origin held for humans but he was shocked at how far he was willing to go especially for one human.

“He would remain in the spirit realm with us and for the time being he will be hidden from all the other spirits, even Maxwell.”

“Why must you got so far for this human.”

“He showed me the importance of life once more and his was cut far to short wouldn’t you agree old friend?” Chronos remained silent, he could tell that Origin already made up his mind and once that happened there was no changing it, regardless of how foolish he thought it was. After staying silent for what felt like minutes he spoke.

“Do what you like.”

With that said Origin went to retrieve the young man’s soul, it was reverted to a small brightly glowing ball and almost innocently floating in the palm of his hand. It was a much longer process than either of them thought it would be, between pouring their mana into glowing soul and dealing with the purification process of the fractured dimension souls it took 7 days and 7 nights. Finally on the last night the soul of the young man started to glow even brighter, so bright it hurt both of their eyes to look at and it begun shaking violently and in it’s place laid the young man.

He looked a little different than either remembered, his hair was now completely white and he remained in his full chromatus form. As he laid there, he looked incredibly peaceful, almost as if the events of the trial hadn’t happened. Origin walked up to the young man and kneeled next to him, he put his hand on his head brushing his bangs from the man’s face. Origin looked over to Chronos and beckoned over to him, as Chronos walked over to them Origin began to speak.

“We shall seal his memories away for now, he deserves a fresh start don’t you think so Chronos?”

“It is probably for the best if he doesn’t remember.” He said as he too kneeled next to the sleeping form and looked between the young man and Origin”

“When will he awaken?”

“It should be any time now, however we should remain by his side until he does, after all it would be very scary to wake up all alone in an unfamiliar place.” Chronos nodded and both remained with the young man until he finally began to stir and open his eyes. He looked around clearly disoriented and confused, he sat up looking between Origin and Chronos.

“Ah don’t be frightened, I am the Great spirit of the void, Origin and this is the Great spirit of time, Chronos. Starting today you’ll be assisting both of us with the purification process okay?” The young man cocked his head to the side and not knowing what else to do, nodded.

“Is there any questions you would like to ask us?” Origin asked while standing up.

“W…Who am I?” Origin smiled gently down at him

“You are known as Ludger Kresnik, the Great spirit of purification.”

“And thanks to how long it took us to create you we have missed a lot of work” Chronos stated while getting up and glaring down at Ludger. The young man shrank into himself and looked away.

“Chronos! Don’t be so rude, he’s only just awoken” Turning to Ludger, Origin then said.

“Don’t mind him Ludger, Chronos is just a grumpy old cat you’ll get used to him.” Origin than offered his hand to the other and Ludger albeit hesitantly took a hold it.

***

Jude sighed as he came out of Spirius corporation, his spyrite research has finally reached a 98% success rate and he deemed it enough to allow it public assess, however many Elympions were still very wary of the spirit use. He had been coming to Spirius everyday to gather their support in spreading the word and use of the new technology, especially now that he had results to show but it was an incredibly slow going process. Ever since the Rugen Consortium took over Spirius it had been easier get an audience but he has yet to have been able to meet the new CEO, Jude just knew that if he could meet them and show them his research and all of his results then they would support him.

Needing to clear his head he decided to go to the park in front of the residential buildings, that park somehow always managed to calm him down and make him feel better. It always made him think of Ludger, in fact all of Trigleph did, a bitter smile appeared on his face as he continued to walk and think of his time with Ludger. It helped to remind him why he worked so hard, why he gave his research his all, Ludger’s sacrifice is the reason he would ensure that Elympios got better and remained strong. 10 years had pasted since that day, since the end of the trial and all the horrible things it brought with it, although everyone had tried their best to get on with their life after, Jude still felt like that man’s death was an open would even after all these years. He had only known Ludger for a short amount of time and yet he felt like he made such a huge impact in his life.

Jude shook his head as he finally approached the park, thankful that it was late enough that no one was there. He sat on the swing and looked over at all of Trigleph, he suddenly felt the need to hum that song that Ludger always did. It helped to relax him and he decided that later he should give Elle a call later to make sure she was doing alright, this time of year was always difficult for both of them. Jude looked into the night sky and hoped that Ludger would be proud of not just him but all of them, he gently began to swing as he continued to stare almost feeling lost in the sky and just then a bright light twinkled and an object came hurling towards him and just before it crashed into the floor it halted and gently floated down.

Jude’s eyes widened never had he seen anything fall right out go the sky like that, it had him curious enough to want to know what the hell it was, thankfully it fell fairly close to him and he walked over to the intersection. As he got closer Jude was shocked, he could barely believe his eyes, it appeared to be a spirit fossil of all things. He carefully picked it up and inspected it, it seemed to hold an almost ethereal glow to it, he had never seen anything quite like this before and his researcher needs kicked into full gear, he just knew he had to find out more about this fossil. Jude carefully pocketed it and decided that he would make his way to Heliobrog where he could safely find out more about the strange fossil.

As he began to make his way he checked his bracers, he may have a stronger desire to help rather than hurt but the monsters between Trigleph and Heliobrog were as aggressive as ever and being alone Jude would have to make sure he was careful. As he approached the field he noticed the fossil in his pocket began to shine brightly, enveloping him in it’s strange and almost warm light but Jude couldn’t sit down and figure out here so he made a mental note to find out when he reached his office. He continued to walk towards the research centre while keeping a careful eye out for any monsters waiting in the dark to jump out at him and yet none seem interested in him, it was as if he had put a holy bottle on. Not a single monster seemed keen on attacking him like usual, in fact they appeared to be frightened of his presences or most accurately he would assume, of the light the spirit fossil gave off.

Thanks to the assumed protection of the fossil it took Jude a little under an hour to reach Heliobrog and he all but ran up to his lab, now more than ever to research the strange fossil in his possession. He did notice however that now that he was safe from any immediate threat, it lost it’s protective glow, another thing to add to his ever growing list of questions for the spirit. He had long since perfected his spyrite device as it should no longer cause any pain to the spirit and simply give form to it and would not bind it either. Jude picked up his device, deciding that the best place to attempt this would be outside on the research deck. He hoped that the spirit would be willing to answer his questions and if he explained his research they might even be willing to lend him a hand or he hoped that would be the case.

Once outside Jude placed the fossil in his device and begun to give it some of his mana, after pouring his mana into the fossil for a full minute he started to get discouraged, there was no reaction from it at all and he was about to give up but then the fossil started to glow and felt warm to the touch. Jude gasped and closed his eyes as there was a quick flash of yellow light, when he opened his eyes an odd humanoid spirit stood before him. The form seem almost familiar but he couldn’t place why but for now he put it out of him mind and went to introduce himself and as he took a step forward the spirits hands shot to his head and it started screaming, such a painful and sorrowful scream Jude was stunned he didn’t know what to do. Jude went to put his hand on the spirits arm to attempt to calm it down, the moment he made contact with the spirit’s form it seemed to crack and shatter in all different directions, the spirit then stopped screaming and was dead still for a moment before going limp. Jude reacted before he thought and reached out to catch the spirit before he fell and gently laid him down, he begun to check him over to see if he could find any immediate injuries.

Jude froze, the face before him was impossible, try as he might he just couldn’t believe it, with the spirit’s shattered form he could clearly see it’s face and there right in front of him laid Ludger.


	2. Chapter 1

Ludger took very well to the purification process, surprising both Chronos and Origin how efficient and happy he was to help although Origin suspected that the only reason he worked so hard was to impress them. It worked to a certain degree as well, for Chronos anyway, now that the young man was reborn as a spirit he seemed much more willing to attempt to get along with the boy even going so far as to ensure Ludger didn’t over work himself again. 

Chronos was the one to first find the young man when he passed out, he would never admit it but he was quite scared finding Ludger unconscious on the floor of the Land of Canaan, after all the work it took to give him life once more and how eager he was to help. Chronos almost felt guilty for not realizing how hard Ludger was working for both of them, he gently picked him up in his arms and took him to Origin hoping he would be able to help the boy. Origin was startled from his work when Chronos barged up to him with a still unconscious Ludger in his hands.

“I just found him like this, what could have cause a newly formed spirit like this to collapse? Could it be the damned humans and their spyrix that caused this?” Chronos demanded, appearing frantic as he gently laid the young man before Origin.

“I am not sure what happened, let me examine him” Origin hovered his hand on top of the unconscious man and closed his eyes, soon he began to glow lightly staying in this trance for a few minutes before the glowing came to a stop and he lowered his hand. Origin looked at Lugder and frowned lightly at him.

“The poor boy simply over worked himself friend, he will be okay after he gets some rest.”

“That is all? A little over worked and he faints? Humans are disgustingly frail, causing others to worry simply because they can not monitor themselves.”

“Oh? So you admit your worry for the boy, how far you have come in such a short time.” Chronos was shocked, he couldn’t believe he stated he worried for the young man, Origin let out a small chuckle.

“I..I do not worry for the boy, it is simply an annoyance for a spirit to lay there when they should be working, all he is doing is causing more work for us, now back to the main question how did he over work himself?”

“Say what you want my friend but you do care for the boy, as to how he worked so hard I don’t believe I have seen him take any breaks, have you?” Chronos frowned he opened his mouth to deny, to say that a previous human would have no reason to work so hard but nothing came out, he had not seen the young man rest, even when Origin and him took a moment to themselves Ludger was still working.

“Why would he do such a thing? He should have no reason to work so hard”

“I don’t know, neither of us will but we can ask when he wakes up for now though one of us should continue the purifying process, I think you should stay with Ludger until he wakes up.” Origin smiled wide at Chronos leaving no room for argument, he didn’t want to stay and wait for the boy to wake up, he didn’t enjoy seeing his unconscious body laying their but he couldn’t say no to Origin either.

“Fine but I will not wait long for him to awaken.”

“Alright, if you say so.” Origin gave Chronos a knowing look and left to continue the purification, Chronos released a sigh and looked down at the young man noticing how tired he truly looked. Seeing the boy like this, knowing it was due to him overworking himself made Chronos fell almost guilty he wasn’t Ludger’s keeper but the fact remained that neither Origin nor himself even noticed left a bad taste in his mouth. He sat down next to the young man and thought back to how Ludger was when he was human, he really should have known that the boy would have pushed himself so hard, he witnessed the trial in it’s entirety and he knew how much of the world was dumped on him and he never gave up. Honestly Chronos thought him a fool, going so far for his friends and loved ones though when it came to protecting Origin he wasn’t much different.

Soon an hour went by and Ludger started to stir and wake up, it was clear that he was still disoriented and confused, he sat up and began looking around before his eyes found Chronos glaring at him causing him to panic.

“I’m sorry, I’ll get back to work!” He hurriedly spat out but that just seemed to make the other more angered.

“You will do no such thing, you will remain here and rest until you no longer look like you’re about to keel over.” Hearing this caused Ludger to shrink into himself, he didn’t mean to be such a burden to the others, he just wanted to show them how useful he was but instead he just cause more work for them. The tension between the two grew by the second causing Chronos to frown even more, he didn’t know why the young man was so upset, he couldn’t care that much about working could he?

“I don’t know why you are upset but you will be able to work after you’re rested” Ludger just gave a small nod, was that not what was causing the others sadness he wondered, he was at a loss not knowing what to say or do, Origin was always the one that knew what to say and almost as if sensing the distress Origin came up to them.

“Ah Ludger! You are awake, you had us both worried are you feeling any better?”

“Y…Yeah” He looked away from Origin

“What’s wrong? Did Chronos say something mean to you?” Said spirit turned his glare on the other while Ludger franticly shook his head

“No” he hesitated and begun again “I didn’t mean to worry both of you, I just wanted to be useful.” Origin gently smiled at Ludger, while Chronos sighed.

“You don’t have to fear such things Ludger, as long as you are here and well that’s all we care about isn’t that right Chronos?” He gave a pointed look at Chronos who glared at Origin before giving a small nod.

Ludger brightly smiled.

***

Jude had to reminded himself to breath he couldn’t believe this, why would a spirit with Ludger’s face be here, before him like this and why in the world did he have such a bad reaction to his spyrite device that hasn’t happened sense celsius 10 years ago. Regardless he would once again have to put these questions on hold until there was a better time to ask, for now he needed to get somewhere more comfortable. He decided his small apartment would have to do, keeping him in the research was out of the question until he could make sense of what was happening and with it’s face exactly like Ludger’s well he preferred to keep this a secret even more.

He put one arm around it’s back and the other at the back of it’s knees and then gently picked the spirit up surprised at how light he was, or hopefully how strong he had gotten over the years, he internally smiled at the thought of him carrying Ludger the man would’ve have been so panicked if he ever carried him like this. He decided to quickly drop by his office since it was on the way and grab a blanket to cover the spirit, hiding him from any prying eyes not that there were really any at this time of night but he didn’t want to chance it.

Thankfully his apartment was fairly close by, only a 10 minute walk from the research centre he juggled the spirit a bit attempting to unlock and open his door without putting the man down, finally after more failed attempts than he was willing to admit he got it open, he cried triumphantly as the door opened. He quickly entered and shut the door, he decided that the couch was the best place to put the spirit for the moment, he was careful not to trip over any of his books or research notes, now that they were in a more safe and comfortable place Jude begun to check the spirit for and sign of injury or sickness that he might have missed in his panic, thankfully he found nothing but he was still worried, with what appeared to be the chromatus in such a sorry looking state he didn’t know how it would affect the other. 

Jude sighed, waiting was always the worst part but he didn’t have a choice so instead he decided to keep busy, if the spirit was anything like Milla it would want food the moment it awakened so the best thing to do now would be to make something to eat before it woke up. He walked over to his fridge and internally cringed, it had been a while since he properly stocked up but at least he had enough ingredients to make a tomato omelette, if he recalled correctly Ludger liked tomatoes not that he knew that that spirit was Ludger. Over the years Jude had gotten better at cooking though he knew he could never be on same level that the Ludger was but it would have to be enough for now, it didn’t take long to finish and he turned to put the plate on his small table. He glanced over at the spirit and almost dropped the plate, the spirit was awake and staring right at him, he quickly put the it on the table and walked over to the other.

“Ah! you’re awake, you should have said something anyway how are you feeling? I’m not sure what happened back there but it seemed to cause you a lot of pain.” The spirit went from an innocent stare to a cold glare and remained silent.

“Uh well I guess you don’t have to say anything, I’m sure you’re as confused as I am about all of this. Are you hungry or anything I made you some food.” The spirit continued to stay quiet and glare, Jude was at a loss he didn’t know what he did or said that made the man so upset he was about to start talking again when finally the other spoke.

“I now understand why Chronos detests humans the way he does, I don’t understand what you gain from putting me through such pain.” Jude flinched he spoke with such a cold detachment, it was almost cruel especially when said with the face of this old friend.

“Wait Chronos? As in the Great spirit of Time?” The mention of that spirit brought back bad memories, he wanted to know what this spirit had to do with the other, unfortunately this line of questioning seemed to just anger him more.

“Yes that spirit, what does it matter to you?” The spirit demanded.

“I’m sorry that’s not what’s important right now and I am very sorry for the pain I caused you, if I had known that summoning you would cause you so much pain I never would have done it.”

“What did you hope you gain?” Jude was little taken back by the blunt question he had to stumble for an answer.

“When I found your spirit fossil I had some questions I wanted to ask and I wanted to know who you were or if you would be willing to help me with my spyrite research. You see about 5 years ago we finally had a huge break through with the research and found a way to summon great spirits without harming or controlling them and we were even able to create more spyrites that way.” He had to stop himself from continuing, the spirit was obviously not interested in spyrites at the moment.

“What a selfish reason, you humans would only be the ones to gain from that interaction. What is your name anyway” Jude had to clench his teeth from saying anything rude to this spirit, it hurt to be so despised by someone with the face of his old friend.

“It is polite when asking for a name to give one yourself but I’m Jude Mathis, one of the lead researchers of spyrite technology, our goal is to allow humans and spirits to co-exist.” The spirit seemed embarrassed for some reason, if Jude didn’t know any better he would say the spirit was pouting and than spoke once more.

“I… am unfamiliar with any social etiquettes, I am Ludger Kresnik the Great spirit of Purification, I have heard your name before it was mentioned by someone called the Lord of spirits they spoke your name with high regards but that doesn’t mean I will forgive.” He stated with some hesitation, to hide his growing uncertainty he crossed his arms across his chest.

“Ludger? Ludger Kresnik? It…it feels like it has been a long while since I heard that name, I wonder if you’re really the same.” Jude mumbled mostly to himself and then continued on “Ah anyway do you really know the Lord of spirits as well? You seem to know quite a few Great spirits.”

“I am a Great spirit myself, it’s not weird for me to know them but I only really know Origin and Chronos, there was a lot of work to do so I didn’t have much time to wander and neither wanted any other spirits to disturb my work so I never truly met the Lord of spirits” Ludger looked away from Jude, seemingly bashful. 

“A-anyway it’s not weird for me to know them if anything you’re the strange one, for a human to know such great beings.” Jude let out a small laugh that he tried to cover up with a cough, it was almost cute to see Ludger flustered, he did find it strange that the other seemed to have very little social interaction almost as if he’s only ever talked with Origin and Chronos but that couldn’t be right.

“I want to ask you a weird question but you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to okay?” He paused looking to the other for confirmation before continuing on. “Do you know who I am? Or more importantly do you remember anything from 10 years ago?”

Ludger turned his head confused, it was certainly a strange question but he wondered why the other seemed so serious about it.

“Although I am not sure what it matters to you, but I have no reason to hide this my first waking moment was in the Land of Canaan and I am unsure of how long I have been awake for so I don’t know if it’s been 10 years but I can say this, I only know you in name.” Ludger wondered for a moment if he said the wrong thing for the other man had such a sad look on his face as finished speaking, for some reason it made his heart hurt seeing that expression but he would have to ignore it, after all why should he care about someone what use wanted t use him.

Jude shuffled on the spot, hearing the other didn’t remember anything broke his heart he hoped there was a way to get his memories back but now that the other was a spirit he didn’t even know if it was possible.

“I see… a-anyway would you like something to eat? It’s not much but I’m sure you’re hungry after everything that’s happened today.”

“Eat? Oh that’s something most living beings have to do to keep up their energy right” Ludger perked up and had a certain excitement in his eyes, Jude was taken aback at the sudden excitement.

“Uh yeah that’s right, have you not had food before?” The spirit shook his head and went on.

“Origin said humans created many different types of “food” from raw to cooked and it can all be for very different, with many different textures and flavours and that each-“

“W-woah slow down Ludger, I mean you are right about that but instead of talking about it would you like to try some first hand.” Jude laughed at how the other practically vibrated with his new found excitement as he nodded vigorously.

“Ok give me one moment to warm it up and then you can try it” Turning his back to the other gave him a much needed moment to organize his thoughts, so much had happened and he still had so many questions like if this Ludger was really the same as 10 years ago and why was he a spirit now. He shook his head, thinking about that wouldn’t be of much help to him now and he didn’t want to keep the other waiting too long especially with how happy he looked at the moment. He picked the plate off the table and cringed, it had certainly lost all of it’s heat since their conversation began, he sighed and placed it in his microwave for a few minutes. The moment it dinged Jude carefully took it out and placed it on the table once more and gestured for Ludger to come over, the spirit hesitated but the promise of trying food was to tempting and he slowly got up and walked over. 

Jude pulled the chair out for the other to sit and then moved to sit across from him as well, now with the food in front of him the he seemed up sure, not knowing what to do next. Thankfully Jude picked up on his discomfort letting out a soft laugh he got up once again to stand by the other.

“Ah sorry I never told you how to actually eat it, don’t worry it’s really simple here just pick up the fork like this, break off a piece and then you can put it in your mouth.” Jude offered the piece to Ludger who took it with a smile, Jude had to hold back a blush at how innocent the other seemed and offered the fork back to the spirit who followed his demonstration. As the other continued to eat his smile grew, clearly enjoying the food it reminded him of Milla in a way but with more manners and more hesitation. It didn’t take long for the spirit to finish and as he placed the fork down for the last time he yawned and rubbed his eyes, Jude smiled gently at him.

“You must be tired after all of today’s excitement, I still have some work I need to finish so you can take the bed, come it’ll show you where it is” Ludger nodded and followed the other to a small room that was fairly bare, Ludger gave the place a quick once over to make sure it was safe and as he did Jude pulled out some clothes from a dresser and handed them to the spirit.

“Here you can wear this, I would image sleeping in those clothes would be uncomfortable, ah I just want to make sure but do you know how to put these on?” The other pouted and glared at Jude.

“I may not be well versed in most things but I can manage that myself at least, although I’m not sure why changing my clothes will matter but Origin said this was a usual human custom at night so I would like to try it as well” Jude smiled once again at the other.

“Alright, it’ll show you the bathroom and you can change their okay?” It was taking Ludger longer than expected and Jude was starting to get worried but as he went up to knock on the door the other came out, with the chromatus form now just around his arms and yellow lines on his face. The spirit was frowning, clearly upset and glared at Jude.

“My form keeps changing, as if I’m falling apart, I don’t like this” Jude hesitated at a loss at what to say, he didn’t know what he could do to comfort the other.

“I don’t know what or how it happened but I promise you I won’t leave you’re side until you are back to the way you were, after all it’s my fault you are like this but for now it’s too late to do anything and you are clearly tired so it’s best you get some rest and we’ll figure it out tomorrow okay? I promise.” Ludger clenched his teeth but nodded, he was too tired to argue with the man but he would just have to trust his words for now. He returned to the room with the bed and laid down thinking about everything that has happened, he hoped he would be able to go home soon, he wanted to see Origin and Chronos again. Jude softly knocked on the door and went in, he smiled at the sight of Ludger in his too large pajamas.

“I will be out here in the living room if you need anything, we can figure out what to do next when you wake up tomorrow so try not to fret too much tonight.” Ludger nodded sadly.

“Goodnight Ludger.”

“N…night Jude.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that's right I am turning Origin, Chronos and Ludger into a family, also I know Ludger does kinda flip though a lot of emotions in this he himself is pretty conflicted on how to take everything in. Anyway hope you guys enjoyed this chapter!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to get this out sooner but honestly fe warriors and now ni no kuni 2 has stolen all my free attention sadly

Since the incident of Ludger passing out both Origin and Chronos had made sure that he was always taking his breaks and getting the rest he deserves, Ludger didn’t seemed bothered by the constant checking in fact he appeared to enjoy it though he didn’t like making the others worry. He had taken Origin’s words to heart, taking rests when he felt tired and not pushing himself anymore, although he still felt that he had a lot of work he had to do before he could be consider himself a Great spirit as the other two. Ludger got lost within his own thoughts as he worked on purifying, it didn’t take him long to fall into a rhythm as it was almost relaxing for him. After what felt like hours of working Origin called out to the young man and walked over to him.

“Hey Ludger, wouldn’t you like to know more about the humans we have to purify?” Ludger stopped and looked at the other, he never thought about what he was actually purifying but now that it was offered he realized he was interested in what they were and what they did to create so much miasma within themselves. With a determined look he nodded at Origin, at seeing the other so serious he couldn’t help but release a small laugh.

“So what would you like to know?”

“What is miasma and what causes it?” Origin couldn’t say he was too surprised at that being his first question, after all it was the reason Ludger and the rest of them had to work so hard.

“Well as you know when the processes is over two things get left behind, the cleansed soul and the miasma which is all the impurities a human has gathered throughout their life.”

“What are counts as an impurity and what do you do with it after it has been extracted?”

“It’s hard to know what causes the impurities within humans but a large part of it comes from their choices and the consequences of those choices, be they good or bad and as to what happens after well…” Origin hesitated on answering his second question, he didn’t want to worry the other but he didn’t want to lie to him either.

“He uses his own body to break it down until it is nullified, which causes him a great deal of pain” Origin glared at Chronos as Ludger gasped.

“Chronos! You didn’t have to tell him like that”

“Then would you have lied to him?” He said nothing to that but Ludger continued on worried for the other.

“If it puts you through pain then please let me help! You shouldn’t have to do it alone.”

“Thank you, Ludger but I couldn’t ask that of you besides I am the Great spirit of the void, I am meant to do this, you don’t have to worry” Chronos glared back at Origin, looking as he was going to protest when Ludger cut him off.

“But you said I am the Great spirit of purification right? And that’s part of the job, after everything you both have done for me even if it’s just a little, I want to help please.”

Chronos snickered while Origin was stunned into silence, it didn’t take him long to recover and turn his attention to his old friend with a sigh.

“I now understand the pain I put you through for all those years with my stubbornness, however” he begun looking at Ludger. “I will allow you to assist in ridding the miasma if you only do it while Chronos or I am present and you can’t push yourself, if the pain becomes too much or you grow tired then promise you will rest.”

Ludger smiled brightly and nodded “I will, I promise!”

“Well now that we are pasted that do you have any other questions about humans?”

“Why do you love humans while Chronos hates them?”

“Ah well, I can’t answer for him but I love humans because they fascinate me, they way the struggle, work together, form bonds, even the way the adapt to their environment by changing clothes or even food! It may not be an easy job we have but it’s one I do gladly for them.” Origin smiled gently at the young man who was listening excitedly.

“What’s food?”

“Ludger don’t encourage his foolish behaviour, humans are selfish creatures and shouldn’t be admired besides once he starts talking about human food he won’t stop.”

“Hush Chronos, don’t listen to him Ludger, I haven’t tasted any of the food but it looks interesting. The humans will take many raw ingredients to create special dishes, all different kinds too, from hot to cold to liquids and solids and one day I hope the three of us can try all different kinds together.”

All through the talking Ludger’s eye grew impossibly wide in excitement, this food sounded amazing and not only did he want to try some but make as well.

“Why haven’t we had any food here and could we make any?” Chronos sighed and answered.

“We do not require food the way humans do, humans need it for energy and to stay healthy, spirits do not need any of that and it would be impossible to bring any food here at the moment but perhaps one day, if you don’t annoy me too much then I can allow it.”

And this time both Origin and Ludger smiled

***

Jude sat heavily at the kitchen table, so much had happened in less then 24 hours and he was no closer to figuring out what happened and most of all he had to know if this spirit Ludger was related to his Ludger, it didn’t help that he couldn’t ask much of the other especially since he either didn’t know or was standoffish when asked.

He decided that nothing could be done at the moment so the best thing would be to continue his research and maybe he could he put together another appeal for Spirius, Jude began bringing his books and research froths office to the kitchen table, deciding that it would be best if he stayed in the open for Ludger to see.

Work kept his mind occupied for a few hours but he couldn’t stop his mind from wondering, even if none of his questions could be answered he thought about how the others would react, he was Ludger after all but only in appearance. Would it be best to tell the others or keep it a secret for now, he started tapping his pen against the table, there was no way he could keep this from Elle if anyone deserved to know it was her but he also didn’t want to crush her heart when she realized he didn’t know anything. Jude sighed, frustrated, what would be the best for everyone in this situation the others should know but if this Ludger wasn’t the past one than it wouldn’t be fair to spring this on him either. He decided the best thing would be to wait and talk to the other about it when he awoke, after all once he explained everything it should ultimately be his choice.

Jude tried to get more work done but he realized he could barely keep his eyes open anymore and was soon out like a light, he dreamed of those nights 10 years ago, having to stand by as Ludger killed his only brother and watch as he held his head high not even having time to grieve, as he sacrificed himself without a second thought for Elle. He wished there was a way to stop it, to change the out come, all he wanted was happiness for his friends but the world wasn’t so kind and especially not to the Kresniks’.

Jude woke up abruptly, knocking himself out of his chair he yelped loudly as he crashed to the floor, he looked around while trying to remember everything that had happened yesterday when he found Ludger standing next to him with a confused expression and his GHS blaring in the others hand. When he realized the other was awake his expression quickly changed to anger and annoyance before setting the GHS on the kitchen table.

“The rectangle would not stop making that annoying noise and you were not reacting to it, it’s quite loud.”

Jude smiled sheepishly “Ah sorry Ludger, I guess I was more tired than I thought” he quickly stood up and picked up his GHS, it was Elle he had no choice but answer it.

“Hey Ell-“

“Jude! It took you forever to answer! Anyway Elise, Driselle and I were confirming that you are still coming up to Sharliton for my graduation?”

“Of course I am, I wouldn’t miss it for the world but couldn’t you text me about that instead of calling?” He wondered what he would do with Ludger but there was no way he was missing Elle’s graduation.

“W-well yeah but I wanted to call, I haven’t heard from you in a while, not that I blame you! I know you’re doing important work and all.” Jude couldn’t help but smile, even though Ludger wasn’t there to raise her she reminded him a lot of the other.

“Yeah sorry about that Elle but I promise I’ll be there.”

“Yay! Okay, it’ll tell everyone and we’ll have a room all set for you just text me when you plan on coming up alright?”

“Of course, it’ll see you then”

“Yup! Bye Jude.” He set the GHS back down onto the table, he loved talking to Elle and he was excited to see her but what was he going to do about the spirit in his room, he couldn’t just leave him but wouldn’t bringing him be the best thing? In the end Jude would have to let the other decide. He turned to look at Ludger who was staring at his GHS in confusion.

“Uh this is a communication device, a way that let’s people talk to others that are far away. It’s pretty useful.” He looked up a Jude with a contemplative look before nodding.

“I’m not sure where to start in figuring out what happened last night but I was thinking that the best thing would be to go back to the area I found your spirit fossil, I don’t know how much it will help but maybe we can figure something out.” Ludger hesitated before nodding.

“Do you know how to get to land of Canaan?” Jude stiffened, he hoped he would never hear about the land of Canaan again and before he could react Ludger continued.

“I need to contact Origin and Chronos, I don’t want to worry them” He got a sad look in this eyes that made Jude’s heart clench, he never wanted to see such a look on his friend’s face, even if he wasn’t his Ludger the similarities hurt.

“…The only way I knew how to get to Canaan would be impossible now but maybe getting you back to your original form could hold some answers? If you want I know the Great spirit of Dimensions, it’s possible that she may know something although I can’t guarantee anything.” Surprisingly the other shook his head.

“Origin said that now it would be best for the other Great spirits to be unaware of my existence, he said something bad may happen if they knew and I don’t want to cause them any trouble, going to where you found me is where we should begin.” Jude nodded, he did still have some work to do in Trigleph anyway.

“Alright but to get there we’ll have to get there using Rusalle highroad and most of the monsters are still aggressive, if you don’t have a weapon staying close to me should be enough the monsters there aren’t too strong.” Ludger nodded, for now while he was unarmed he decided it would be best to not let Jude know that he can fight.

“Great but for now we should really get something eat” at the mention of food Ludger’s eyes sparkled he was still excited at the prospect of food and despite the heavy tones of their earlier conversation Jude couldn’t stop the smile from appearing on his face. “Well I see you’re up for it, we can get something on the way, I don’t have much left in here I really need to restock.” 

Jude made quick work of getting changed and attempting to clean up his research on the kitchen table while he waited for Ludger, he insisted the other war one of his hoodies after all he didn’t want to run the risk of anyone recognizing Ludger, especially since they were going to Trigleph. It didn’t take much longer for the other to be ready, before they headed out Jude reached over and tugged Ludger’s hood on to hide his face and standing so close to the other he couldn’t help but marvel at their new hight difference, the other used to be so much taller than him but now their roles were reversed which made him wonder at how much would their roles be reversed now. Ludger stared at the other questioningly and suspiciously causing Jude to laugh nervously and apologize before stepping back. He did know what this new road ahead would hold but he had a feeling it would be a long and difficult one and this time even if it wasn’t his Ludger he wanted to make sure the other had a happy ending.

Food was their first order of business before heading to Rusalle highroad, he didn’t want to waste too much time be he also didn’t want to disappoint the other by getting him something mediocre but he decided it would be worth it taking the time to bring him to one of the smaller breakfast restaurants near his apartment. Ludger’s eyes widen at the menu, he seemed both excited and overwhelmed at all his options and when he settled on a tomato omelette Jude could help but smile sadly, it reminded him too much of his Ludger but when the other looked at him in confusion he shook his head and ordered for himself.

It didn’t take them long to finish eating and once they were done Jude once again check his gear before they finally began their journey to the highroad with him reminding Ludger once more to stick close to him and as the monsters roaming came into view the strange glowing started once more but this time coming directly from the spirit. The other didn’t seemed to notice and waited for Jude to lead the way, he quickly shook his head to clear it, there was no point in gawking but with the other with him maybe he would be able to tell Jude why he started glowing again.

“Uh hey Ludger? Are you purposely protecting us with that glow of yours?” At first the other just seemed confused at the question before he looked down at himself and realized that he was indeed glowing, he simply shrugged after all Origin sometimes glowed it couldn’t be that strange right? Jude sighed, he should have known he wasn’t going to get any answers from the other.

Thanks to the others protection they made it back to Trigleph in record time and just after the morning rush too when things were starting to settle down again. Ludger was amazed at the city, it was so different from anything he had ever seen and everything was so structured and orderly but also some how chaotic as well, it was all so fascinating to him. Jude had to fondly nudge the other to the residences to get to the area where he first found the spirit fossil and when they got there both their eyes widened, in what he assumed was the exact spot was a lance one that Ludger recognized immediately and without a second thought he reached out to grab it and the moment he did, flashes of memory flooded into him, memories he couldn’t make sense of or grasp and when the spear disappeared he fell to the ground. Jude rushed over to the other wanting to make sure he was okay, he did a quick once over to make sure the other wasn’t injured or in any pain and then the other spoke.

“…I-I don’t know what happened but there was a girl and a cat but I don’t know either of them but it felt like I did, I couldn’t see their faces but my heart hurts, why does it hurt for things I don’t know?” Jude froze, it’s impossible, this Ludger that didn’t know anything from 10 years ago shouldn’t know anything about those two right? It couldn’t be that this spirit was the same Ludger because if it was, that would be too cruel.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bet you thought I was dead but jokes on you death doesn't return my calls.

Ludger was roughly awoken by Chronos something that wasn’t unusual for the other however the near panicked look on his face was, even though he tried to hide it.

“Another spirit will be arriving shortly, you must stay in this room and hide your presence from them.”

“But why?” He asked drowsily not understanding what was happening, Chronos stood imposingly in front of him.

“We’ll answer your questions after, for now do as I say.” He sighed and struggled for a moment “Please.” Chronos whispered. They were both quiet for a moment before Ludger nodded and the other swiftly left. He paced around his room for a bit but he wasn’t used to having nothing to do for long periods of time and this room was only ever used for sleep. He quickly became bored and had to internally fight with himself, he couldn’t stay in this room much longer but he also didn’t want to disobey the two Spirits he stood staring at the door hoping it would give him answers. As he got closer to the door he realized the voices of the others could be heard, he placed his ear on the door and listened hard, if he was going to be stuck here he wanted to know what was happening.

“There has been talk that a new Great spirit has been born, do either of you know anything about this.” It was a strangers voice, that must be the visiting spirit Chronos mentioned Ludger thought.

“Regardless of whether we do or not what interest is it of yours Lord of Spirits.” Chronos sounded so cold, he never heard that tone used before even when the other got annoyed at him for asking too many questions.

“There is no reason for such hostility my friend.” Origin turned to address the new guest “The was a spirit that had a large amount of power, rather than cleanse it for purification we decided to give it life as lesser spirit to assist us.” The Lord of spirits side glanced at Origin, suspicious of the two.

“If you needed the help why not come to one of us? Why go through all the trouble of pouring life into a soul?”

“Each Great spirit has a job of there own to do, I did not know want burden the others with this I already had to get Chronos’s assistance.” The Lord nodded staring straight at the other two, almost right through them, right to where they had Ludger hidden. Neither would be moved by her gaze.

“Well if you do hear anything please tell me, it’s important that we ensure nothing like the trial happens again I’m sure you both understand.”

“Of course, even I regret all the suffering that happened because of it, though it was necessary.”

“Even so I will not allow something like that again, I’m not like the previous Maxwell and I will do whatever I must to avoid it as I’m sure you both understand and with that I shall take my leave.” Wishing the others well the Lord of spirits left, as soon as she did they let out a breath of relief.

“Ludger it’s alright to come out now, she is gone.” Ludger jolted, he thought he was being stealthy but he was never able to hide from either, with a deep sigh he stepped out of the room shyly.

“What was that about? Why did I have to hide?” Origin smiled sadly when his eyes met the other.

“About a year ago was the ending of a very drawn out and dangerous trial, many people lost their lives, many living things suffered because of it and it was spirits that begun the trial.”

“There is no point in hiding this from him, Origin, myself and the previous Lord of spirits started the trial to judge humans.” Ludger was shocked, why would they do something like that, being the source of such suffering. Origin glared at Chronos but did not object.

“It’s true, we had to see if purifying the souls was worth it and that trial was how we did it I regret the pain it caused but it was a necessary evil one that shall never be repeated.” Origin appeared so seriously he hardly knew what to think but before he could decide Chronos spoke once more.

“Young one you should stay away from other spirits, Maxwell was aware of your presence as we were and today she gave us a grace and a warning but as long as you remain with us you won’t have to worry we’ll protect you.” He still wasn’t exactly sure what happened or what it meant but he was touched that the other two cared so much.

“Ah my friend, I believe that is the kindest thing you ever said to him” Origin laughed which prompt Chronos to blush and angrily look away. Ludger smiled, he may not know much of the world yet but he knew these two were his family and he had no reason to leave.

***

Jude didn’t know what to say but the Ludger before him looked so hurt and confused, he knelt down beside him and gently placed his hand on the others back, regardless whether or not this was the same Ludger he couldn’t stand seeing him in such pain. Jude sighed internally, was it selfish of him to hope that they were the same, that Ludger could have second chance at life that he could have the life he deserved. As his conflicting thoughts ran rampant the Spirit suddenly got up and begun walking to the train station as if in a trance, not knowing what to do and not wanting to leave to the other alone Jude followed behind.

He watched Ludger move slowly and unsteadily on his feet, worried he wanted to do something, say something but he couldn’t bring himself to. Turning his face away he noticed the streets were empty something highly unusual for Trigleph, there was barely a sound either, no whispers, no footsteps or train engines, not even things being shifted by the wind. Dread settled deep within him, he felt a strong urge to reach Ludger for what reason he didn’t know yet as he begun to move he found himself unable almost as if the air itself chained him to the spot.

“L-Ludger” Jude tried to call out but it was barely above a whisper however something cause the spirit to turn and his heart broke more, the other looked so sad, so broken and then from the corner of his eye he noticed something steadily getting closer to Ludger who was looking solely at him. Jude had to do something he didn’t want whatever that was to harm the other, he wouldn’t allow it, using all his might he pushed through. He ran to the spirit putting himself between whatever was approaching and the other, Ludger let out a distressed noise but he ignored it keeping focus.

“Fear not human, I wish no harm to either of you.” A voice sounded from all around them and before them stood what appeared to be a strange looking fox, it was small and colourful but he wouldn’t let his guard down, not with Ludger here, not with the other clenching the back of his jacket quivering.

“Who are you? What do you want with Ludger?” Jude demanded, the creature seemed unfazed staring through the other two.

“I am known as Verius the Great spirit of Heart, I have been looking for the Great spirit of purification. Origin has long since been hiding him from us.” Jude’s eyes widened but remained moved, it didn’t matter what this spirit said he would protect Ludger. Verius looked at the spirit and seemed regretful for a moment before returning expressionless.

“I am here to observe the purification spirit, nothing more. Origin continues to do things on his own without consulting any of us and I will be the judge of his actions this time.” As if awoke by the name Ludger stopped shaking and opened his mouth to speak but hesitated, Jude continued unaware.

“What do you mean judge? And what happens if you don’t approve?” The fox’s tails twitched before answering.

“Then we shall kill the spirit, even Lord Maxwell is concerned about this new unknown spirit and we shall not allow another trial too many suffered for nothing.” Ludger’s eyes widened, this must be why Origin wanted him to stay away from other spirits, they were strange and very dangerous but he needed to know more.

“Where is Origin and Chronos?” He cringed slightly as his voice wavered, hoping neither noticed.

“They remain in the Land of Canaan, unable to sense you thanks to the four Great spirits hiding your presence we could not have them interfering with your judgement and with that said stay strong young one the road ahead will not be easy but we pray you do not fail.” With those final words spoken Verius seemingly faded from their vision and in their place was the usual hustle and bustle of Trigleph. Jude let out a breath he didn’t know he was hold, after all this time he thought he would be done with wild adventures but even if he wanted to there was no way he could abandon the other not when it was his fault that Ludger was here.

He gently brought him to a nearby bench leading the other to sit, many questions were running through both boys heads all being left with no answers. Not being able to take the silence any longer Jude spoke.

“We should focus on getting you your powers back, if they intend to judge you by fighting we won’t stand a chance right now.” 

“You would still want to help me?” Ludger asked in surprise and Jude may have felt offended if it wasn’t for the desperate look on the others face.

“Of course I would, besides you’re in this mess because of me so I’ll do everything I can to get you back home but for now we should go back to my place and from there figure out what to do next okay?” The other nodded.

“The trains should now be running to Heliobrog now, it should save us some time.”

“Alright.”

“Ahh but there will be a lot of people there around this time, will you be okay?”

“Humans don’t scare me just…spirits I’m not sure about.” That left Jude with some questions but he would leave it for later, they had bigger concerns at the moment. He quickly lead them toward the train station thankful that he brought his wallet with him and soon after the train to Heliobrog arrived, the two were able to find a booth seat. Jude wondered if he should say something just about anything would be better than the oppressive silence that hung over them but he didn’t know what to say, if his comments would even be appreciated but the other looked so lost.

“On a train just like this one I met someone that would change my life.” Ludger turned to him with a surprised expression, why would Jude tell him this and how could one person change another life after all their lives were so short.

“What happened? How… how could did another effect you so?” Jude smiled fondly, remembering.

“It was actually an accident I met them, I was there as a favour to my friend as a ceremony happening at the train station and she was supposed to write a story on it and I was to go with her but she couldn’t make it. I was completely lost, it was one of my first times in Trigleph after all but I soon met a kind stranger, he helped me get to the station and from there a whole mess of things happened.” The spirit listened intently and doing his best to visualize the event.

“What kind things happened?”

“Uhh i’ll tell you about it later.” Ludger looked disappointed, he was hoping to learn more about the stranger and maybe a little of Jude too but he wasn’t disappointed for long.

“Aha hey now don’t look so sad, I can tell you more about that person if you want.” He nodded vigorously and the other continued on.

“He was very strong and kind but he would also take on the burdens of others without qualms, one of his best and worst qualities was he would gladly take care of other, we had a whole party of 9 people and yet he would cook for us all and listen to our problems. Even I couldn’t resist being taken care of by him but looking back I feel somewhat guilty, with everything that was going on honestly we should have been the ones taking care of him.”

“I’ve never heard of a human like that, are there others like him?”

“It’s possible but I haven’t run into anyone quite like him, he was a good friend.”

“I hope to meet him one day.” Jude flinched and his heart broke in more ways then one.

“Unfortunately about 10 years ago he gave his life to protect a special little girl.” Ludger was silent for a moment, he couldn’t explain it but hearing the retelling something surged in him an emotion he couldn’t explain but there was one thing he knew for sure.

“He sounded happy, even if logically it may not seem that way I bet he was. If there was ever a time I would gladly take on Origin’s and Chronos’s burdens and even give my life.” For some reason that made Jude laugh, he felt happy to make the other laugh even if he didn’t understand and it was enough for him.

“Ahh that seems very fitting of you but you really shouldn’t be so self sacrificing I mean if the roles were reversed how would you feel if either gave their life for you?”

“Oh! That…I wouldn’t like that, their my family.” Jude smiled sadly and placed his hand gently on the others head ruffling the hair slights.

“Let’s talk about something happier, no need to dwell on something so upsetting.” Ludger nodded, unbothered by the contact and not long after the two arrived in Heliobrog they quickly left the train and begun moving their way to Jude’s apartment where they had many things to discuss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have not and will not abandon this story don't you worry, no matter how slow going it maybe!  
> also here's my twitter if any of you ever wanna drop by and say hello: https://twitter.com/JuruJurudo


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